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Live News Doesn’t Get Better Than This: Ernie Anastos Tells Weatherman, “Keep F*cking That Chicken”

September 18, 2009

By now you’ve heard of the big on-air expletive by New York Fox 5 news anchor Ernie Anastos, who after telling weatherman Nick Gregory “it takes a tough man to make a tender forecast,” cheerily interjects, “keep fucking that chicken.”  (It is unclear if he was referring to sex with Nicole Richie.)  Oh, you hadn’t heard this yet?  Well, here it is (very briefly NSFW).

What’s so great about this, besides it being uttered by a perfectly-coiffed, fake-laughed Chuck Woolery clone (and that the guy’s first name is Ernie), is that it was entirely intentional.  This was not something serendipitously caught by a live mic in transition from anchor to reporter, like the Sue Simmons outburst (again, very briefly NSFW) a while back.  This was not an O’Reilly-esque explosion taped then released years later (NSFW, unless you work where I do).  This was not even a “dot-cock” Freudian slip, committed then immediately corrected by the very same Ernie Anastos we’re discussing.  There was no wide-eyed shock or covering of the mouth in mortified surprise, no sputtered apology and nervous tittering.  There was only the well-enunciated, deftly-placed, even understated “Keep fucking that chicken,” followed by a hearty laugh, as if he’d said no more than “Thanks, Nick.  We’ll watch for that rain tonight.”

Maybe Ernie Anastos was tired of the make-up chair, day in and day out.  Maybe the rigid, to-the-second, perma-smile, stiff-shirted life of a Fox 5 Daily News Anchor finally got to him.  Maybe he woke up that day, showered, trimmed his nose hair, and just knew something would be different, but didn’t yet know what.  Maybe he bought some stuff from Dean & Deluca, took it home, watched some TV, then hopped a cab to the studio, along the way thinking about how he was going to make things just a little more interesting tonight. Maybe he was in his office just before go-time, sat deep in his high-backed leather executive chair, and knocked back a few shots of Milagro Reposado.  OK, so it wouldn’t be a Peter Finch in Network moment, but it would be something to get those little grannies to cover their ears.  But it wouldn’t get him fired if he apologized, which he would probably have to do.  Yes, Ernie Anastos knew now what it was.  So maybe he stood up and wobbled just slightly, straightened his tie, took a long look at himself in the mirror and said, “You know, I’m on the news every damn night, but tonight I’m going to make the news.”  And he did.

  1. The f0OL permalink
    September 18, 2009 12:31 pm

    Best quote all year! T-shirts are in the works.

  2. September 18, 2009 11:04 pm

    Changes the meaning of the F in KFC no?

    in fact, there’s your shirt!


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