The Entertation Index: November 9

Cruise, Tom – Some ex-Scientologists say that wayward members of the church were threatened with a Cruise “beatdown” if they misbehaved.  While the thought of a Suri Cruise whooping is terrifying, it…what?  It was going to be Tom?  Bring it on!

Link:  Cruisin’ for Bruisin’? (NY Daily News)

Duritz, Adam – The Counting Crows frontman was set to sing at a karaoke bar in Savannah, GA, but was told it was too near to closing time and he would have to return another night.  That’s the official report; we hear it was because he was actually going to sing Counting Crows songs.

Link: Duritz Denied (NY Post)

Francis, Joe – As a result of a plea deal, a suit against the Girls Gone Wild founder was recently resolved with Francis getting credit for time already served.  Terms of the deal include probation, $250,000 restitution to the IRS, and a public admission by Francis himself that he is indeed an asshole.

Link: Francis Free (LA Times)

Kardashian, Khloe – The ? Kardashian isn’t pregnant—yet.  But Lamar Odom is trying to make that happen, “soon.”  Given their persistent, aggressive smooching at the “wedding,” Odom-Kardashian coupling would difficult, as only one can emerge alive.

Link: O’Dashian Baby-Making? (Huffington Post)

Lohan, Lindsay – The movie star is currently warring with her father, Michael, who has said all sorts of mean stuff: “God is taking her entire career away from her. Because she’s forsaken everything He’s given her and she’s done nothing but misuse all the gifts she’s given.”  Unfortunately, God did not take her career away before she produced Herbie: Fully Loaded.

Link: Lohan Losing Talent (People)

Sublime – A judge recently ruled that the band’s surviving  members cannot use the name anymore, as it was trademarked by member Bradley Nowell, who supposedly never intended it to be used after his death.  (He died in 1996 of a heroin overdose.)  They will reportedly continue under the name 311.

Link: Sublime Sublimates (Rolling Stone)