Meet the New Boss…

“I hope I die before I get old…” Roger Daltrey, singing words penned by Pete Townshend, before he got old.

Let me state for the record that I am not young.  For any of you reading out there who’ve been imagining an 18-year-old stud penning some music columns for your favorite pop culture site, hold on to that mental picture but also know that it’s not accurate.  Without divulging my true age, let’s just say I’m a child of the Eighties and leave it at that.  So please don’t accuse me of what Diane Cort called “ageism-that’s being prejudiced against people because they’re old.”  But with that said…what’s up with all these geezer rock stars taking over the headlines lately???

In case you haven’t heard, it looks like you’ll get to see what’s left of the Who perform at halftime of the Super Bowl next year.  I’m sure this is good news to all the leather-clad classic rocksters who think Frampton Comes Alive is one of the best live albums ever.  Apparently this includes the majority of the music blogosphere, as judged by the fact that this was reported on sites I love like Brooklyn Vegan, Paste, and Spinner and even sites I don’t care much for like Rolling Stone and Hit Fix.  Days before, all the afore-mentioned sites were speculating on the potential breakup of Aerosmith, with the internet all abuzz over the latest news.  First Steven Tyler’s leaving the band, then he’s not, then Joe Perry says Steve’s gone right before Tyler bumrushes Perry’s solo show to sing during an encore.  Is that not enough for you?  Try out the news that Ringo Starr and Paul McCartney are teaming up for Ringo’s next album?  Or what about the senior-citizen-fest that was the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 25th Anniversary Benefit concert? 

To all this brouhaha over the rocking out of the Geritol generation, I have one word:  MEH. 

Don’t get me wrong, I love the Who as much as anyone.  I own most of thier albums and listen to them regularly.  I consider Townshend, Moon and Entwhistle at the top of their chosen disciplines, and I’m happy that Daltrey got to go along for the ride.  But I’m bumfuzzled as to how the potential of the remnants of this once mighty band playing for 10 minutes at the World’s Greatest football game is tremendously newsworthy?  Listen, internet?  I can understand you letting us know about this “event”, but next time could you just send us all an email or something?  How about a text?  Facebook post?  To waste real estate putting this on every freaking site known to man is what we in the blogging business like to call “overkill”.  M’kay?

And please, dear reader, help me understand how giving us “news” stories that tell us what we already knew (namely, that Steven Tyler is a narcicisstic egomaniac) is in any way more newsworthy than, say, the release of the new Them Crooked Vultures album?  C’mon, I think John Paul Jones deserves his due for helping create a terrific hard rock album as opposed to Tyler and Perry’s efforts to destroy their waning careers.  Again, I’m not saying that Aerosmith infighting isn’t worth a little pixel space, but is it really front-page Pitchfork material?

There is too much amazing stuff going on in music these days to waste time on useless classic rock star information.  Many classic rock artists are doing amazing work right now.  Bruce Springsteen has had a phenomenal decade and just concluded a tour that certainly deserves more press that U2’s envronmental destruction machine.  Paul McCartney has released two terrific albums in the last two years:  2008’s The Fireman album Electric Arguments and 2009’s solo Memory Almost Full.  Big Star just played New York City for about the third time since the 1970’s.  I’ll repeat that Led Zeppelin’s John Paul Jones is back with a vengeance as he’s teamed up with Dave Grohl and Josh Homme to form Them Crooked Vulture.  So why is it that we’re regaled with this blog confetti?  Tell Daltrey and Townshend to release some credible new music, then my ears will perk up.  Tell Steven Tyler to listen to his maybe-bandmates and stop trying to make the next “Don’t Want To Miss A Thing” and put out a real rock album.  I promise, I’ll buy it.  But the more I see stories about the latest ass pimple that Mick Jagger popped, the more I’m ready just to blow up the computer and start buying homemade Daniel Johnston tapes again.  C’mon Internet, man up!