The Enertation Index: February 18

Ebert, Roger — Sometimes a story just touches you, and this one is, I think, one of those stories. From this month’s Esquire, the story of Roger Ebert — who hasn’t spoken a word, eaten anything or had anything to drink since 2006. A truly great writer and critic, and a truly great story from Esquire. Read this.

Link: Roger Ebert’s Cancer Battle (Esquire)

Eubanks, Kevin — On the heels of news that Jay Leno’s ten o’clock show is canceled and he’ll be regaining the Tonight Show comes the latest development, which has sources revealing that bandleader Kevin Eubanks is planning to leave Leno’s side. According to sources, Eubanks’ decision to leave may come from the fact that “I only went to ten o’clock with him because I knew that wouldn’t last, and then this Tonight show thing comes back up. I just can’t laugh at these jokes any more. Yes, Bill Clinton is a philanderer. Yes, misspelled headlines are silly. Yes, there are a lot of people who don’t know the answers to questions. Please, someone, kill me.”

Link: Bandleader Kevin Eubanks Will Leave Jay Leno’s “Tonight Show” (NY Times)

Fiction, Science — Courtesy of the eagle-eyed readers of FARK comes a column from the Seattle Post-Intelligencer written by a librarian who suggests science fiction to read and watch but admits she’s never read or seen any of it. “I didn’t become a librarian because I like to read,” she allegedly said. “I got into the library business because I’m a big cowel-neck sweater and ankleboot wearer.”

Link: Science Fiction for the Rest of Us (Seattle Post Intelligencer with thanks to FARK)

Kardashian, Kim — Further proof that the entire Kardashian family is either a.) living in a fantasy world or b.) complete morons comes this week when Kim, connected to the internet on her phone from an airborne passenger plane, tweeted “I’m on the airplane…love wifi! I am sitting next to an Air Marshall! Jim the air marshall makes me feel safe!” This is a troubling trend as it comes on the heels of recent Kardashian tweets “Hey, I’m at the Pentagon — someone left this emergency door ajar! Weird!” and “My friend Steve is the best! Good luck on the undercover sting today, Steve! I know those guys will think you’re Esteban Villanueva!”

Link: Kim Kardashian Outs Air Marshal Via Twitter (CNET)

Sheen, Charlie — The actor’s upcoming jail time for assaulting his wife may curtail Sheen’s successful sitcom career, as he has been sentenced to three years in a California jail for the crime. Choose your own joke: a.) This inevitably means that Sheen will be on the receiving end of two and a half men, or b.) Sheen’s latest project is Two and a Half Years with Possibility of Parole for Good Behavior.

Link: Charlie Sheen Jail Time to end “Men?” (Digital Spy)