The Entertation Index: March 11

Beck, Glenn – The controversial commentator got an ad boost from Survival Seed Bank, which sells non-hybrid seeds for “crisis gardens.”  These gardens would serve as food insurance if “politicians and bankers…bring the whole thing crashing down[.]”  However, Survival Seed Bank does not sell beer or Pop-Tart seeds, so we’re not interested.

Link: Beck Gardens (Huffington Post)

H, Triple – The star wrestler recently visited the Wall Street Journal for a feature on professional wrestling’s global expansion.  Since his mother, Linda McMahon, is running for a Connecticut Senate seat, reporters wanted to know H’s political preferences.  Triple demurred, gave a dignified Crotch Chop, and said that Democrats, Republicans, and those of other political stripes could “Suck It!” equally.

Link: Triple-H’s Politics (NY Post)

Lohan, Lindsay – Mean Girls star Lohan will not be participating in the latest Ungaro fashion show.  According to Gawker, her last stint featuring nipple tassles and bare buttocks didn’t exactly curry favor with…wait a minute.  Nipple tassles and bare buttocks?  Wouldn’t those be the only reasons to attend a fashion show?

Link: Lohan Out at Ungaro (Gawker)

Papa, Rozlyn – The supposedly cheating Bachelor contestant now has an alleged sex tape making the rounds on the internet.  Papa’s rep said she had “no knowledge of any tape,” which means, “dammit, I knew that blinking red light under the sweater on his dresser wasn’t an ‘alarm clock’.”

Link: Rozlyn Papa (TMZ)

Rancic, Giuliana – The celebrity news personality debuted her slightly fuller figure at the Oscars, which the press has dubbed “pre-baby” weight gain to try to help her conceive.  Um, isn’t “pre-baby weight gain” also just called “weight gain”?

Link: Giuliana Pre-Baby (Us Magazine)

Wayne, Lil – The super-successful rapper, after several delays, has finally begun serving a year-long prison sentence on a gun charge.  One wonders if his hit “Lollipop” will have a different meaning when he gets out.

Link: Lil Wayne in Jail (MTV)