The Entertation Index: May 12
Jameson, Jenna — Adult film star Jenna Jameson and UFC superstar Tito Ortiz seem to have worked through things and were photographed enjoying the beach together with their children this weekend. This also comes on the heels of Jameson telling reporters four days ago that she and Ortiz were “America’s couple.” You know, kind of like how Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were “America’s couple,” only Katie didn’t have sex with a guy dressed like Batman and Tom never submitted anyone in a triangle choke. Or did they?
Link: One Big Happy Family (Celebslam)
Mercer, Bob — The British-born businessman who brought the Now That’s What I Call Music CD series to the United States has passed away. He will be remembered in an event that many are already referring to as Now That’s What I Call a Tasteful and Elegant Funeral.
Link: Industry Veteran Bob Mercer Dies (Billboard)
Ortiz, Tito — See: Jameson, Jenna
Phoenix, Joaquin — Joaquin Phoenix is reportedly shopping around a “documentary” made by Casey Affleck which features the actor frequenting call girls, receiving oral sex from a publicist, snorting cocaine and being defecated upon in his sleep by a fellow actor. At least, I think the latter is what is meant by “Phoenix has his career dropped onto him as he sleeps.”
Link: Joaquin Phoenix Documentary: Even Buyers Aren’t Sure If It’s a Prank (LA Times)
Ramones, The — It gives me great pleasure to be able to include my all-time favorite band, the Ramones, in an Entertation Index; Fox Searchlight is fast-tracking a biopic about the band. But they hired the screenwriter behind the current Nightmare on Elm Street remake to do it. This teaming of scribe and subject should come as great news, however, to people who love having their childhoods raped.
Link: A Ramone Weighs in on the Ramones Biopic (NY Magazine)
Walters, Barbara — This week will see the View matriarch and longtime Oscar interview special chieftain undergoing a heart procedure, and we here at TBTS wish the journalism maven best of luck for a speedy recovery. Statistically, heart attacks in women are more frequent than one might think. It’s a good thing, then, that Walters’ View co-hosts are exempt, as Whoopi Goldberg is a man, Joy Behar is a hen and Elizabeth Hasselbeck is a government-programmed robot. Get well soon, Barbara!
Link: Barbara Walters to Undergo Heart Surgery (ABC)
White, Betty –– Good Lord this country can’t get enough Betty White these days. Case in point? Here’s a photographic timeline of the 88 year-old actress ranging from 1922 to 2010. Upon seeing the photos, Larry King nodded, smiled and said to himself “They’re so cute when they’re young. Got the world on a string. If I knew at 88 what I know now…”
Link: The Official Betty White Aging Timeline (Buzzfeed)