The Entertation Index: September 28

Boyle, Susan — The Scottish singing phenom’s brother, telling reporters a stalker is currently harassing Boyle, claims the investigation should be properly conducted before his musical sister dies “like John Lennon.” He’s got a good point. No one should have to have the last thing he or she sees in this mortal world be Yoko Ono’s face.

Link: Boyle’s Brother Fears She’ll Die Like Lennon (Toronto Sun)

Somebody save Nick Cannon! He's trapped under there!

Mariah Carey — The singer was performing live at the Singapore Grand Prix Sunday when she took a spill right onto her posterior, waving over assistants to grab her by the arms and help her back up. Let’s hope that fall didn’t damage the part of her ass her songs come from!

Link: Mariah Carey Falls on Singapore Stage, Waves Over Assistant to Remove Her Stiletto Heels (NY Daily News)

Carrey, Jim — Actress/author Jenny McCarthy talks to Oprah on today’s episode about the waning and eventual ending of her long time relationship with funnyman Jim Carrey, telling Winfrey “when it’s not fun anymore, you need to start investigating and do an inquiry into the relationship.” She allegedly added, “Sure, it’s funny when you guys at home see someone talking with their butt, but when you live with that person, and see that butt eating or kissing your face before you go to bed, it gets old really fast.”

Link: Jenny McCarthy on Oprah – Jim Carrey Relationship was “Not Fun Anymore” (People)

McCarthy, Jenny — See: Carrey, Jim

Centipede 2, The Human — Dutch director Tom Six, whose Human Centipede made audiences cringe earlier this year, tells the press that his forthcoming sequel to the horror flick will steer away from “realism” and instead be “pretty nasty.” This is a smart move. I always thought that the gleeful optimism of the original, wherein three people were sewn together mouth-to-anus, was just a little too feel-good for my tastes.

Link: Human Centipede 2 Trailer Slithers Online (Moviefone)

China — A Taiwan art museum is planning to lend a portrait of a seventeenth-century Chinese general to an art museum in the Hubei province of China next year. In return, the Chinese will send one hundred objects to Taiwan’s museums for exhibition. But you know what they say: the problem with receiving several gong-bi and shui-mo paintings is that you just want more gong-bi and shui-mo paintings an hour later.

Link: Taiwan Museum to Lend Painting to China (NY Times)

Reviews, Book — The Huffington Post has collated five of the — by their count — meanest book reviews ever, including accounts of books by Jonathan Franzen, Steig Larsson and Jonathan Safron Foer, among others. Though I happen to believe they limited themselves by only featuring books from the last five years, egregiously omitting an early review of Shakespeare’s Merry Wives of Windsor which read “the author’s motives be those foolish and rought with rust/Would rather I fastened my farthingale too high/as to constrict my very breath/and tightened my bourrelet/to cause my skull to ache/than gaze upon these words/which are like a cordwainer dry of leather.” Yeee-ouch!

Link: 5 Meanest Book Reviews Ever (HuffPo)