The Entertation Index: November 1

Anderson, Capri – The porn-star escort who accompanied Charlie Sheen to his hotel room (see “Sheen, Charlie–” below) says she did not sleep with the actor, and is considering suing him because “she felt her life was in danger … and she also felt like she was being held in the room against her will.”  If Capri does file suit and win, it might be the first time ever an escort gets paid for not having sex.

Link: Anderson + Sheen (TMZ)

Arquette, David – During his separation from Friends star Courteney Cox, Arquette admits having unsatisfying sex with a woman and crying afterward due to the lack of true intimacy.  The lady with whom he had his rebound hook-up then started crying when she was told that she had done it with “Dewey, the goofy cop from the Scream movies.”

Link: Arquette’s After-Sex (ETOnline)

Gaga, Lady – A University of South Carolina professor is offering a course called “Lady Gaga and the Sociology of Fame” in the spring of 2011.  The first lesson will be “Creating Clothing Out Of Things That Have No Business Being Clothing.”

Link: Gaga Studies (Gawker)

Patridge, Lynn – The mother of recently-dismissed Dancing with the Stars contestant Audrina Patridge gave a long, drunken, smoking, obscenity-filled rant sitting on a step outside an L.A. restaurant.  In addition to insulting Audrina’s The Hills co-star Lauren Conrad, Lynn said of her daughter, “Audrina is going to f***ing rise.  She’s got class.  She’s a Polish, Catholic, f***ing full-on Italian.  Not only that, she was raised right.”  Way to set an example, Lynn!

Link: Patridge Vents (Huffington Post)

Sheen, Charlie – The Wall Street actor’s was not only “found” passed out naked in a trashed hotel room as originally reported, but also coked out of his mind with a porn-star escort locked in his bathroom while he punched walls and repeatedly shouted the n-word.  RadarOnline describes the incident by saying, “Charlie had gone to the edge of losing touch with reality,” which may be true.  The true reality-bending head-scratcher is that this serial screw-up gets paid almost $2 million per episode of Two and a Half Men to be painfully unfunny.

Link: The Sheen is Stripped (RadarOnline)

What you may feel like this morning.

Walking Dead, The – AMC debuted the highly-anticipated zombie series The Walking Dead last night, and it was absolutely…OK, I didn’t get to watch it because of some really odd scheduling in the non-website-writing parts of my life.  Those of you who watched it, please comment below.  Was it awesome?  Disappointing?  Uplifting?  Necrotizing?

Link: Walking Dead Debut (EW)