The Entertation Index: November 19

Pray for "You Give Love A Bad Name."

Danza, Tony – At the funeral for his friend Philip Carlo, Danza publicly upbraided the priest giving the eulogy then finished it himself.  Wow, guess we found out who’s the boss.

Link: Danza’s Outburst (PopEater)

Jovi, Bon – The celebrated rocker is touring North America again, and Huffington Post is offering free tickets to a few lucky winners.  However, if the band plays any of its new stuff they could hardly be called “winners.”

Link: Bon Jovi Tickets (Huffington Post)

Osbourne, Kelly – The Dancing with the Stars Season 9 contestant appears on the cover of Shape magazine after trimming down to 112 pounds.  She admitted getting nervous about being photographed in a bikini—which she says she has never worn before—so her father Ozzy stabbed all the swimsuits with his cane, and snorted them to protect her.

Link: Osbourne on Shape Cover (Shape)

Palin, Bristol – Palin’s lackluster DWTS performances have somehow been enough to advance her in the competition, but not enough to keep disturbed viewer Steven Cowan from shooting his TV over the injustice.  A greater injustice?  That any TV set remains unshot after an airing of Two and a Half Men.

Link: Palin’s Success Enrages Viewer (Gawker)

Reynolds, Ryan – The guy married to Scarlett Johansson who makes zillions of dollars doing fun stuff like starring as the new Green Lantern was just named People’s Sexiest Man Alive 2010.  And the rich get richer…

Link: Reynolds’ New Award (People)

Waltz, Jasmine – David Arquette’s rebound woman described sex with him as “nothing exciting” and “quick and painless.”  She denied that Arquette cried in front of her, which he said he did after sleeping with someone other than Courteney Cox for the first time.  If Arquette didn’t weep right then, he will when he reads what Waltz said about his performance.

Link: Arquette’s Fling (NY Daily Post)