The Entertation Index: January 17

Apprentice, Celebrity – Donald Trump has announced the next lineup for his hit show, and it does not include Lindsay Lohan.  According to Trump, “Lindsay has to straighten herself out first.”  Exactly.  Lindsay needs to control her addictions before she can participate in a nasty, backstabbing, confrontational, frequently humiliating competition that is broadcast to millions of people.  That should help.

Link: Lohan Not on Celebrity Apprentice (Life & Style)

Ford, Tom – Fashion designer Ford tells the New York Post that he was convinced on a 1986 elevator ride with journalist Richard Buckley that he would marry him.  The two have been together since then.  Note to readers: this is the only time that elevator love has ever lasted, so please try to ignore body spray and after-shave commercials.

Link: Love in an Elevator (NY Post)

Martell, Kayla – The Miss America Pageant celebrated its 90^th anniversary this weekend with a contestant who has alopecia areata, a disease that results in almost total hair loss.  Representing Delaware, Martell hopes to increase awareness of the malady by using it as her platform.  She has taken top prize in several previous pageants, and missed winning others by a hair.

Link: Bald Miss America Contestant (People)

Let's hope he was drunk when he bought this.

McGraw, Tim – The country singer reveals that drunk-texting his wife, Faith Hill, served as his motivation to get sober.  Note that it was not an apparent penchant for getting drunk and ordering shiny black cowboy hats and animal print shirts from eBay that did it.

Link: McGraw Sober (PopEater)

Out, Lights – FX President John Landgraf is blaming large viewership of other shows, including MTV’s Teen Mom 2, for the low ratings for his network’s boxing series.  FX, if you think people are watching a show about pregnant and newly-parent teens instead of yours, you either need to get a new president or a new show.

Link: Lights Out Not Doing So Great (EW)

Sheen, Charlie – The recent travails of the Two and a Half Men star have caused “a high level of concern,” according to Nina Tassler, CBS entertainment president.  Whereas you might get fired from your job for pleading guilty to assault, trashing a hotel room after going so nuts that the porn star with whom you were consorting locked herself in your bathroom, and generally partying so hard that you became legendary for your benders rather than your work; Charlie Sheen keeps his.  Tassler said, “What do you get fired for? Going to work and doing your job?” then added, “This show is a hit…that’s all we have to say.”  That, folks, is Hollywood in a nutshell.

Link: Sheen Causes Concern (Huffington Post)