The Entertation Index: May 2

Lantern, Green – Director Martin Campbell explains that his much-anticipated super-hero movie showcases some “extraordinary” alien worlds, but is “a story that is very human and very much about human emotions…”  That means the CGI is shitty.

Link: Lantern’s Planet-Scapes (LA Times)

Men, Two and a Half – Sitcom co-creator Chuck Lorre has hinted that the new, Charlie Sheen-less version of the show will feature co-star Jon Cryer more prominently along with a character-to-be-named-later.  While you try to figure out how this will make the show better, realize that it couldn’t have gotten much worse.

Link: 2.5 Men w/o Sheen (Hollywood Reporter)

Stewart, Kristen – The actress portraying Bella from the super-popular Twilight series laments that the graphic birth scene from upcoming installment Breaking Dawn couldn’t be even more brutal: “I would have loved to have been puking up blood.”  Stewart shouldn’t worry, since that should be the reaction of most of the people watching this movie.

Link: Stewart’s Lament (EW)

For God's sake, laugh. He can sense when you're not laughing.

Trump, Donald – Jerry Seinfeld sort of walked back his sort-of chastisement of Trump’s birther statements by saying, “I love Donald Trump, all comedians love Donald Trump.  If God gave comedians the power to invent people, the first person we would invent is Donald Trump… God’s gift to comedy.”  Similarly, this is why Carrot Top was invented.

Link: Trump-Seinfeld Entente (Extra TV)

Wedding, Royal – With Prince William initially struggling to get the wedding ring on Kate, she was finally able to do what so many “commoners” would like to do: give the Royal Family the Middleton finger.

Link: Wedding Finally Over (MSNBC)

Wintour, Anna – The Japan Society’s Japan Earthquake Relief Fund organized a charity auction that included, among other couture items, a meeting with American Vogue editor Anna Wintour and a $1000 shopping spree at any DVF boutique.  Had you won both of those, you could have been berated for your fashion sense and bought exactly one pair of socks at DVF.

Link: Win with Wintour (NY Post)