In Which We Confess Our Sins and Engage in Some Light Blasphemy
Bless me, readers, for I have sinned…
I hate the Rolling Stones. Hate them. Flames… Flames on the side of my face…
I love Quentin Tarantino movies but I hate Quentin Tarantino.
I genuinely like all four Alien movies (and the first Alien vs. Predator, but not the second.)
Billy Joel has written exactly three good songs: “Scenes From an Italian Restaurant,” “You May Be Right,” and “Movin’ Out.” The rest are garbage. (I will allow for “The Longest Time,” but only ironically.)
Adam Sandler is not now, nor has he ever been, funny.
The Dark Knight Rises was an unforgivably boring conclusion to a series that had long forgotten it was supposed to be based on a (fairly ridiculous) comic book character.
I didn’t read A Game of Thrones until after I’d watched the HBO series.
I’ve never seen Grease or Gone With the Wind or Casablanca. (Until recently, this list also included Rocky Horror and Dirty Dancing. No thanks to my wife…)
…But I have seen Xanadu. That’s kinda like Grease, right?
The Matrix sequels were, in fact, not nearly as bad as people like to say.
Ford is better than Chevy.
I didn’t care for Toy Story 3.
99% of punk music is crap.
Despite being an unapologetic metalhead, I don’t think I could identify a single Slayer song.
I sometimes get Cate Blanchett and Gwyneth Paltrow mixed up.
I’ve never read The Canterbury Tales. Or Hamlet. Or The Catcher In the Rye.
I’ve read The Great Gatsby twice and still have no idea what it’s supposed to be about.
I do not understand where all this Anne Hathaway hate comes from. She’s gorgeous and a damn fine actor.
Star Trek TNG is better than TOS (though I generally prefer Kirk to Picard)
Star Wars is better than Star Trek
…and Firefly is better than any of them.
I’ve never seen any of the Clint Eastwood westerns.
I’ve boycotted the Oscars ever since Forrest Gump beat out Pulp Fiction for Best Picture.
Glee‘s first season was genuinely good television. The rest not so much.
I have never seen a single episode of any of the following: The Voice, American Idol, Honey Boo Boo, Duck Dynasty, or anything involving housewives.
Justin Timberlake is awesome.
Woody Allen has exactly one great movie to his name, Annie Hall, which was made in 1977. I do not understand his continued popularity.
I miss Homestar Runner.
Sometimes I can’t think of anything to blog about.